Hurry Up and Wait

This post is coming to you live from the American Fork Hospital mother and baby unit. Things have been the most boring kind of exciting the past 24+ hours.

I woke up at 3am yesterday having contractions. The doctor asked me to call in if I had more than 6 in an hour. I had 6. From 4-5 I had 9. From 5-6 I had 9. And so on. They didn't hurt at all, they were just strong enough to get my attention and make me uncomfortable enough to keep me awake. I woke up Cam around 4 just to let him know. Neither of us went back to sleep. I went about my day, tried to sleep again and managed to take a 2 hour nap from 9-11. Cam went off to work. (trooper).

I called my sister and my mom and after listening to me breath hard through a couple contractions they convinced me to call the doctor. I just really didn't want to cry wolf if I wasn't in labor and they weren't very painful, but I also wanted to give the doctor a chance to stop labor if he wanted to. These boys definitely aren't done cooking yet.

I called the dr. and was told to come in for a labor check. I am 2 cm dilated at 80% effaced at this point. They also took my blood pressure and a urine sample. Blood pressure was 170/110. Not. good. and there was protein in my urine. Add the swelling that's been going on and we've got ourselves a recipe for toxemia and/or preeclampsia (still not sure if those are the same thing...) The dr. sent us right over to labor and delivery at the hospital to be monitored.

Once we arrived, my blood pressure had dropped to a much better 140/80, but I was having contractions every 6-7 minutes. The doctor said that since I was past 35 weeks he wouldn't do anything to stop labor if it really got going. This was at about 2:30. I had only eaten breakfast and was starving, but because of the potentially dangerous situation I wasn't allowed to eat anything. Stupid.

We waited around until 7 when the doctor came back to check on me. He checked my cervix again. Still 80% effaced and *maybe* 2+ cm dilated. Not terribly encouraging. I was still having pretty normal contractions, and they were coming about 5 minutes apart (some were 4) but they weren't hurting and if I didn't watch the monitor I didn't even know they were happening. There were maybe 1 or 2 that really got my attention.

The dr. was still concerned about the other symptoms I have of toxemia and said if I didn't improve drastically by the time he came back to check me again that he would have to induce me to avoid a terrible situation for me and the boys. He said that if that happened to count on a NICU stay and to be induced in the morning.

After talking to the dr, I asked if I could please have something to eat since things weren't progressing and he said yes. Off Cam went to get me a veggie sub and a red mango. Genius. Food has never tasted so good. While he was gone, I had a grade A meltdown. I need these boys to stay put. It is too early for them to come. I don't mind being uncomfortable for a while longer. It's really nothing when you think about it. I have had no complications up until this point and all of a sudden I need to be induced? It all fell apart so quickly and I felt like a failure as their mom. My mother reminded me that I have done everything I possibly can for these babies and if my body is done, it has done its job. And the boys will be fine. A NICU stay does not mean months on end. A NICU stay does not mean the boys will not be OK. It just means they'll need a little extra help because they ran out of room a little early. And honestly, me having toxemia makes complete sense. It comes from the placenta and I have two of them, double the chance for an issue.

The dr. had 3 deliveries at another hospital to attend to and assured us he would come back to check on me again. He is extremely concerned about the toxemia. At around midnight he came in and my blood pressure was perfect and the contractions had died down completely. I was really hopeful that we'd get to go home, but that doesn't look like it's going to happen. They checked us in to another room to do a 24-hour urine collection (yuck) and more monitoring today. The doctor came in this morning around 7:30. My blood pressure is elevated again. I have contractions every time I move, be it rolling over, sitting up or walking to the bathroom. I can feel my feet filling up with water when I stand up to brush my teeth. Clearly, there is a problem.

From the looks of things, we're hoping to buy me and these boys as much time as we can without endangering my life. (sounds dramatic to me too...not my words). And I got visited by the case worker for longer term hospital patients this morning, so I'm pretty sure I'll be on bedrest here until the boys are in our arms.

Things could definitely be worse.

I have never been so grateful to wake up and still be pregnant than I was this morning.

Thanks for giving us a fighting chance, body!