One of my
favorite [satirical] blogs talks a lot about "not letting the sizzle fizzle." Quite often, when there's a lull in the conversation, or we're cuddled up on the couch watching nothing at all, one of us will ask the other:
What do you remember?
This question is always in reference to something that happened in the summer and fall of 2008. I'm shocked almost every time by the minute details that C remembers. We found each other captivating.
Reminiscing about the beginnings of our relationship is a surefire way to stir up those wonderful feelings of love. I think one of the reasons this works so well is because it makes just how far your relationship has come extremely clear.
The trick is to continue to find each other captivating, and doing that takes effort from both sides. You must make yourself captivating, while also putting effort toward always looking for the good in your spouse and finding him captivating.
So here's what we remember:
*Warning-This is going to be long...but also full of pictures.]C and I met at EFY. We were both counselors in Flagstaff, AZ that summer for a couple of weeks. He thought I was pretty cute, I could barely keep my jaw off the floor when he walked into the room...y'know-healthy attraction. I first saw him on a Saturday at a meeting. He came in late. We didn't even talk. After the meeting, I went to my grandparents' house and said, "Grandpa. There is this guy."
"What's his name?"
"I don't know."
"Where's he from?"
"I don't know."
"What does he do? School? Work?"
"I don't know."
"Well, Go back!"
We sat next to each other at church [Yes, C, I did notice you cutting 2 people off to be next to me.] We talked all through Sacrament Meeting and Sunday School [NOT a normal thing for me...] and C asked me for a ride to the airport to pick up his car. We ended up talking in the parking lot until 2 am.
The rest of the week we looked for reasons to spend time together. We both joined the choir, only to later find out that we were only there because the other was there. He asked me to teach a lesson with him on Friday, so we had to spend time Thursday prepping for it. [C tried to kiss me, and I promptly turned him down...good move on my part, I found out later.]
By Saturday, I was pretty bummed out that he was going home to Queen Creek. C left for the weekend, and I didn't really hear from him the whole time. (C totally disagrees and says we texted non stop all day, even when he had a date with another girl Saturday night. I must've pushed this far from my memory due to said "other girl.") When he came back Sunday night, though, he was awful happy to see me and kissed me under the stars in my backyard.
From then on, we were pretty inseperable. Our EFY kids had a blast flirting for us the next week, and the stairwell became our favorite rendezvous after lights out. [The rest of the counselors didn't like us much. Girls were mad that C wouldn't really talk to them anymore and guys were ticked that C's boys kept cutting in when I was dancing with them.]
EFY ended, and I went back to Utah to work. C stayed in Arizona. Thus began 8 weeks of non-stop phone calls, e-mails, and text messages.
"Kristin. Each day you seem to amaze me more than the day before and you become more and more attractive to me. It's making me sick :) but I think it's a good one though. I don't want to throw up. It's more that I want it to never go away ever."
-C. Call
I surprised C and flew down a day early. He had sent me flowers for my birthday. I left right after the flowers arrived, so I stuck one in my hair. [One of the details he remembered about the first time he ever saw me.]
We went wakeboarding with his family on Friday, headed to California early Saturday morning and spent the day on Santa Monica beach.
For my birthday, C got me tickets to go see Wicked. [He was playing for keeps at this point.] He even bought me a Christmas ornament from the show. [A family tradition.]
After the show, we went back down to the beach. We rode the ferris wheel on the pier, and walked down the shore to "beach house no. 18" [lifeguard station].
[caption id="attachment_829" align="aligncenter" width="450" caption="Credits: Call Me Kristin "Of Noble Birthright" Freebie, Paislee Press"][/caption]
Way overdue "I love you"'s were exchanged and C said one more thing.
What do you think about shooting for that 10%?
[in reference to the 10% of EFY counselors that get married.] I just replied that I thought that was a great idea.
We went back up to school together and got ready for the upcoming semester. We knew we would be getting married, but thought that the mature thing to do would be to wait until April. It was 8 months away, and I'd always wanted a Spring wedding. We decided on April 18th, after the 18 on the lifeguard stand and spent the next week in utter misery.
C took me on a walk to the park and asked, "How set on April are you?"
A huge feeling of relief swept over me. "Not at all!"
"We could get married in December..."
"December in Phoenix is like Springtime everywhere else..."
"Your dad will be here next weekend, won't he?"
"What?! No. Wait. *deep breath* Ok."
[Insert giddy laughter here.]
C asked my dad's permission [which is an entire other story. poor guy!], but did it face-to-face [major points for C.]
And then popped the question.
Which is also it's own story, but you can read it here!
So, as for becoming that "captivating" girl that I once was.. I think all it takes is a little selflessness. As much as I like being made a fuss over, C does too. When I met him, I was confident, friendly, and had a strong testimony. He loved that I wore flowers in my hair and that I would flirt with him from across the room. He loved dancing with me and discussing gospel topics endlessly. We surprised each other.
I guess this means that the secret to keeping the "sizzle" alive is to date each other. Dress to impress. Flirt. Dance. Surprise. Etc. It's so worth it.
And if you need a little inspiration, Check This Out!
How do you stay captivating?